This Christmas

Today is Christmas Eve. Though I'm not worshipping Jesus Christ, I'm a lil' bit excited. Tomorrow is Christmas Day. 18th December is Christina's birthday and 2009 is just around the corner. Here to wish Christina 28th Happy Belated Birthday, wish her forthcoming album release soon and would have well-sold. You're always great!

Merry Christmas and Happy 2009 to all my friends!!

xoxo.

My Recording Sharing 2 - Run

Hi there. It's been a long time I didn't have any little recording with my fave song. Here I come with my recent fave which I recorded last night called "Run" originally performed by British Band, Snow Patrol, and then popularized by Leona Lewis and Three Graces. All versions are just blown me away. I love the lyrics that brings me to another level of just a sad love song.

It's a short 1.45" a capella recording. I'll keep updating more, so please don't forget to get back. Hope you enjoy.

Please click here to download and enjoy.

Here's the lyrics:

I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

xoxo.

Another Leona has born!

This season's British TV singing reality show X Factor winner has just born last night. Congratulations to Alexandra Burke, you definitely deserve it. She's described as another Leona Lewis, as Leona was the winner on the same show in 2006. I'm quite agree for certain standards, Alexandra owns a big voice, and she sings out my type of music, too. Her debut album is announced to be released on March 2009. This is another album for me to wait next year.

This is her very first single CD, "Hallelujah".

Another good news, Leona Lewis is announced to have 3 Grammy nominations for Record of the Year ("Bleeding Love"), Female Pop Vocal Performance ("Bleeding Love"), and Best Pop Vocal Album (Spirit). And my fave country artists, Martina McBride and Carrie Underwood are also nominated for Female Country Vocal Performance. I'm pretty sure Leona is gonna beat the other nominated artists like Sara Bareilles, Katy Perry, Duffy, Pink. If the focus is given to the vocal, Leona wins, no doubt. Her voice is too perfect. Go, my girl!

This girl is so beautiful in both her appearance and voice.

About the Female Country Vocal Performance nominated artists, I can't give any guesses, all are great. Not only Martina and Carrie, but also LeAnn Rimes and Trisha Yearwood. Martina, LeAnn and Trisha are veteran artists in Country Music, they have more experience than Carrie does, but not to forget Carrie's mind-blowing vocal, so everyone has her chance to win.

Don't forget to catch February 8, 2009 Grammy Awards, it would be so grand for the musicians.


xoxo.

Recent Faves

Been listening some happy uptempo songs for a whole day. Feel so refresh for having such good mood to fill myself a great time. These are what I listen to,

1. Connected by Katharine McPhee
This is a song from Barbie The Movie. It's hard not to move my body a little bit when listening to this one. I can hear Kat's voice quality has become richer than before, love Kat's current voice.

2. Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It) by Beyonce
Another big R&B piece by Beyonce. She rocks this kinda music, this is her element. This song really sounds like her "Get Me Bodied" from her last album "B'Day". And i love the MV of this song, the dance is so interesting, 3 girls wearing super shorts and high heels moving the steps. I saw her singing this at American Music Awards which is awesome, she's so cool. A big kiss for Bee.

3. The Little Things by Colbie Caillat
This one is her recent single. This song isn't sounded like her previous 2 singles, "Bubbly" and "Realize", much more interesting with its easy-to-remember phrases, "back up, back up...mess up, mess up...wake up, wake up...give up, give up..." A different eye on Colbie apart of her pop folk genre.

Hope you have a good mood like I always have.


xoxo.

gniroB

Currently at my lovely hometown, Nilai, a peaceful small town. Good to sleep, good to eat but nothing to have fun, kinda dull, super boring right now. I listened and shuffled songs in my phone for a thousand times, really had a deep realization to the songs, from the voice to the music, surprisingly I've got another joy to know more about my fave music. It's the good one.

I read an interview by a China Actress, Zhou Xun from newspaper in this morning, this is personally meaningful to me. She said "everyone is borned to be distinctive, that is why every single people has his/her different name from the others, thus there is no point to compare yourself with the others. You are you" I'm so much agree with what she said. I am me, my name is Lim Kok Joo, nobody has the name like mine. I want to do everything with my distinctive ability. I'm still believe in myself no matter what..


xoxo.

One night in Brussel

I, my guitarist, Hui Hsing and pianist, Shu Chyi went Brussel to have an audition for the coming christmas eve show. Quite enjoy the time I had tonight, though there are technical problems and I was a bit nervous, I really had no idea with what the hell I was crapping up there but overall still alright. As always, imperfection is good. And I really happy with the compliments I had.

Not to forget, thanks to Hui Hsing and Shu Chyi for playing such beautiful music for me to sing. I wouldn't have done this so well without you both. Also, thanks to my big brother, Yafu for letting us to use your guitar and Lu Ling for always being our listener, I've known you better, we have something in common. Haha!

Don't know why, I just love the feelings I had tonight.

xoxo.

Special credit

Been practicing some songs with my guitarist, Hui Hsing and pianist, Shu Chyi this afternoon. Everything sounded right, really appreciate the time we had, got to sing with accompany instruments. Here to specially thank to Hui Hsing, he's been exhausting for both his job and our collaboration, I know all the transposing jobs odded you most of the time, but you're the most emotionless music people I've ever met, just feel so grateful for what you guys have done with me. Thanks Yafu for sending me back to home and Lu Ling for being so friendly, giving me some food when I felt hungry.Haha!

I was like this is the moment I should appreciate, appreciate my passion towards music for years, friends around me being so helpful whenever I need help, encourage me whenever I feel skeptical to myself, and not forgetting my family always being so supportive and proud of me though their action sometimes do not show what they really feel. I mean all these are too huge for me, a thank doesn't really show how much I appreciate the efforts you guys have given to me. No matter who you are, any positivity or negativity you've done to me, you are just like my siblings, love human beings around me, you are my rock.

xoxo.

A standing ovation performance

I spent almost my whole day surfing Youtube today, finding inspiration for our demonstrative speech and of course watching my favorite live performances. I've watched Mariah Carey latest performance in UK X-Factor, she sang her international hit "Hero", her voice was so awful, she was like trying to hit the notes and did a bundle of flats which is gosh! she couldn't sing live since she has strained too much with her voice, feel bad for her.

So, here comes my fave Christina Aguilera in 49th Grammy Awards performance. This was a performance tributing to Prince of Black Soul, James Brown, she sang Brown's trademark song "It's a man's world" which earned standing ovation. She has true lung, babe!

At the end, Jamie Foxx was like "Wow, this white chick can sing".

This is one of the most mind-blowing live performances I've ever witnessed. I swear I've watched this for a zillion times. What kinda woman is this? How could she sing like that? Salute for Xtina. You rock!! Love ya.


xoxo.

Music is still my life

My mom called me last night, I thought what was happened. After I realized the purpose my mom calling, I initially laughed for a few seconds, but then I became so conscious to turn my mom down. My mom was actually calling to ask me singing a few songs in my cousin's wedding on this coming Sunday.

I found this is very funny because my mom always calling me only for some serious purposes (or maybe this is quite serious for her, about her "face"(proud)). I was ceaselessly turning my mom down in the phone about doing this is because I hate singing in the wedding, in other word, I hate singing in front of my relatives, feels a little weird, don't know why. After argument with my mom, I still have to sing in the wedding, no turning back. Fine, singing is just like talking. No big deal!

Quite obviously, music is still occupying most of my life. When comes to singing, once you sing the song nicely, you're actually coming your way demanding more on singing whether it comes from you yourself or by requested. This can be really fun.


xoxo.

Inspiring Pieces

Today is a very inspiring day. Quite honestly, I wouldn't be so encouraging without music. As always, I'm here to share my fave music again, songs that brought me along my life and keep telling me believing myself. Powerful inspiring song can make people goose bumping and feel so positive. I mean for me it's like a magic, such strength flows under your skin, feels like a puzzle is suddenly completed.

These are the songs inspire me all times:

1. Beautiful - Christina Aguilera from the album "Stripped"

"This song is one of the greatest pop songs ever written", Simon Cowell said. I totally agree. I must admit that Christina Aguilera's songs are all great for me. But this one is her icon, a song for every single discouraging and unconfident people out there. "I am beautiful, no matter what they say, words can't bring me down..."
Inspiring rate: 98%

2. The Voice Within - Christina Aguilera from the album "Stripped"

Yeap, Christina again. This song kicked off my love to Christina, this is the first song I heard from her. Not "Genie in a bottle" nor "What a girl wants", but this. "When there's no one else look inside yourself, like your oldest friend just trust the voice within..." This tells me to be a true believer, believe in yourself.
Inspiring rate: 95%

3. Anyway - Martina McBride from the album "Waking Up Laughing"

Country music is always inspiring. If country music can contribute a lesson, I think it's moral education. "You can pour your soul out singing a song believe in that tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang, sing it anyway..." The lyric is awesome, it writes my heart out, do anything anyway though you already knew the consequences.
Inspiring rate: 95%

4. I Believe - Fantasia Barrino from the album "Free Yourself"

This used to be my personal theme song in 2004. I love the arrangement of song especially the bridge part. "I believe in the impossible, if I reach deep within my heart, overcome any obstacles won't let this dream fall apart, see I strive to be the very best, show my life for all to see, 'cause everything is possible when you believe..." You can also try the version by Diana DeGarmo and Syesha Mercado.
Inspiring rate: 90%

5. Freckles - Natasha Bedingfield from the album "Pocketful Of Sunshine"

When talking about Natasha Bedingfield, you might only know her "Pocketful Of Sunshine" or her very famous Pantene commercial song "Unwritten". This piece is from her newest album "Pocketful Of Sunshine". A very meaningful phrase, "why waste a second not loving who you are?" Imperfection is good, it makes you beautiful, lovable, and valuable. "They show your personality inside your heart, reflecting who you are..." This song tells me not to be sad if there's a remark on me because that's me. Like what Kevin has told me, the uniqueness of me, no one can replace me. Just be myself.
Inspiring rate: 85%

6. Can't Take That Away - Mariah Carey from the album "Rainbow"

This is Mariah Carey's theme song. An inspiring beginning "They can say anything they want to say, try to bring me down but I will not allow anyone to suceed hanging cloud over me..." Similar to "Beautiful", no matter how people think or say about you, just follow your own way, believe the path that you initially used to take. Break all the rules and search your own niche.
Inspiring rate: 90%

7. When You Believe - Mariah Carey & Whitney Houston from the album "Prince Of Eygpt Movie Soundtrack"

This song has meant a lot to me, it's a song for UTAR Talent Night 2008. We sang this together, really miss those training days. This song always makes me goosebumps. "There can be miracle when you believe, though hope is frail, it's hard to kill...You will when you believe..." Everytime my mp3 shuffles to this song, to the intro of the song I'll be so emotional, 'cause it brings a lot of memories, sweet one.
Inspiring rate: 95%

8. So Small - Carrie Underwood from the album "Carnival Ride"

Another country music, the title "so small" has never like what it means, the lyric is so "big". When things around hassle you a lot, bear in mind the people who love you, your family, your friends, your loved one. This song teaches you to look things around calmly, after it's gone, you'll notice it doesn't seem that big enough to swallow you whole and makes you do not able to see the other good things. "When you figure out love is all that matters after all, it sure makes everything else seem so small..."
Inspiring rate: 95%

What's in my mp3?

Just had a short conversation with Yoke Fong in this afternoon before my Public Speaking mid-term test, she recalled me how did I change my view of seeing or listening to music. It's been 2 years ago I started my English song singing. I can still remember the song "The Voice Within" by Christina Aguilera had changed my direction of singing and the way listening to song. That was an American Idol night, I sat and watched the show with about 20 people in TV room at Millenium Court, listening to Katharine McPhee singing the song. I was like becoming more insane after listening to Christina's rendition. This song has changed my life of music and meant a lot to me.

2006, a dramatical change to my mp3. All true vocals are in my mp3 until today.

11 November @ What's in my mp3?

1. Halo - Beyonce
Newest single by Beyonce apart from her new hit "If I Were A Boy". I got so impressed by the intro, the combination of piano and beats. Its casual and easy-to-remember "Halo.." is another good thing about this song. Not to forget Beyonce's voice, I love the part Beyonce does the "Halo" when she ends up the word with falsetto. I'm sure this is gonna be another great hit from her.

2. Take A Bow - Leona Lewis
Put aside Leona's smash hit "Bleeding Love" and "Take A Bow" by Rihanna, this song is another R&B piece by Leona. This is the last song I stick up from the album, Spirit, kinda difficult to digest the song at first. Her powerful voice hit a G5 for the song in full voice and whistle notes in 3.35. This is a great vocal materpiece.

3. How Far - Martina McBride
A country song by a 4-time Country Music Awards (CMA) Best Female Vocalist of the Year, Martina McBride. This song is damn hard to sing, especially the first sentence of the chorus part, a sudden jump off of an octave "how FAR...", not only about to hit the note but also need to maintain the power. That's not easy, 'cause as the pitch goes higher, our voice will tend to go sharper (an opposition of powerful voice).

Hope you guys can give these songs a try.

xoxo.

My Recording Sharing 1

This is the first time I post my personal singing recording in here. The song is "Anyway" originally sung by Martina McBride. I sang this for practicing on last 2 months, this song is personally inspiring to me. It's a phone recording, that's why the quality sucks. Due to the poorness of Blogspot uploading system, please click here to download and listen. I'll keep uploading the clips.

Thanks.

xoxo.

She's great, she's Martina McBride.

I've just watched some live performance videos of Martina McBride, Carrie Underwood and Faith Hill. Wow, country singers are true vocalist, I mean their voice singing live is as good as recording version. Every single performance blew me away, I was so impressed. I love country singers, they really mean what the true singing is. Like Martina, though she's a 40 something woman, the age is never a barrier for her to be a powerhouse. She has great personalities, amazing voice and good inspiration, she's my role model of singing country. She's great!

This is Martina.

True artist for me is actually someone who's not only sing well in studio but live too, and for sure, has great inspiring willpower to push somebody's action and attitudes, kindhearted, humble and never acted like he/she is a star.

Martina McBride is,
Carrie Underwood is,
Leona Lewis is.

Today, specifically, I love country music, I love Martina McBride.


xoxo.

Jeers and cheers

After a night struggling with my computer, I have to reformat it. My god, my photos, videos and documents all gone. Fortunately I have a "backup" for my music which I stored part of my songs in my cellphone, but not all. Okay, I'm kinda easy-come-easy-go, so it didn't really upset me for too long as long as my computer still can be working. After this kinda sucky act, I've learned a lesson - back everything up for in-case before a "disaster" happens. This is scary. I have to redownload all the anti-virus, music player, MSN, Firefox which sucked up my whole night.

Now fine, throw the sad story away. It was such a fun night spending with friends singing KTV last night, having more fun singing English songs with Yoke Fong. Fun, fun, fun.

I can't wait for the arrival of November, all my fave singers like Xtina, Beyonce, David Archuleta, David Cook and Katharine McPhee have their new album out. I've listened to the lead single, Xtina's "Keeps Gettin' Better", Beyonce's "If I Were A Boy", David A.'s "Crush" and Kat's "I Will Be There With You". All are just great.

xoxo.

Keep on singing my song

"...Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed,
it's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid,
no one reaches a hand for you to hold,
When you lost outside, look inside to your soul..."

This world is no longer the world I used to think, it's so insecure. This is a place where innocence is quickly claimed, the reality is so cruel and make me so afraid standing my ground not to run out of my faith. When I'm lost in this world and nobody gives me a hand, I'll turn to look inside my own soul, trust my own voice deep inside my heart, just like trusting my old friend, deciding what I feel alright.

Unlike the odd time I ever had, I was so skeptical to myself, I doubt myself whether I can sing, am I really understand the word singing? All these doubtful questions popped up because of the people out there criticizing or not giving any comment. I was being too serious on what they think about me, but never think of what I think about myself. I spent too much energy to look what people think about me, why don't save it for another effort?

After all these, so what? Who cares about that? I'm doing what my heart tells me to and never regret. I don't care what people might think about me, I just keep on singing my song, no matter what. As long as I'm alive, my voice inside never dies.

Trust the voice within

I believe everything will get done unexpectedly better than it supposed to if we really get onto something. Certain intention make a person has super power, you can run faster than you're able to when the stray is chasing you, the ill will soon recover if you keep telling yourself that you've got no time to be sick.

We have our very own extraordinary ability lies within that we might not know. So what you need to do when you're in helpless is just trusting the voice within your heart, kicking off all the craziness.

Inspired by song "The Voice Within".

xoxo.

Fragile

I must admit that I'm kinda fragile sometimes, can easily get hurt by words. I truly believe word is the greatest weapon of all time, perhaps I took them all too seriously, and I often need some time to fade them all away from me and starts questioning myself "Where's my faith?". And of course, I'm ceaselessly learning how to be a "so what?" or "what's the big deal?" attitude. It really counts in my life.

I often listen to inspiring song to relieve myself when I'm down. And I realize I'm always being too emphasis on the bad things surrounding me, highlighting all the negativity or criticism makes me couldn't see all the good around me.

So I'm now trying to love the negativity. Though every single negativity challenges my faith, but I'll get another lesson learned once I've overcome.

"No matter what we do, no matter we say,
we're the song inside the tune, full of beautiful mistakes.
And everywhere we go, the sun will always shine,
but tomorrow we might awake on the other side."


xoxo.

An impressive journey

I just came back from Mid Valley Carrefour to buy daily stuff. It's kinda thoughtful along the way. I saw 2 pairs of Japanese old couple in the bus were enjoying Mentos Fruit which I felt very impressive. "Who says old man cannot eat candy?" This kinda scene warms me, don't know why.

Not forgetting another funny thing, I directly paid RM1.50 to the Metrobus fare collector for the way from Mid Valley back to PJ Section 14. After paying,
"Mana pergi?", he asked me.
"PJ Seksyen 14", I answered. (I thought the bus fare rises again)
"Besok start 1 Ringgit", he thrown me this.
I said "o.." (I was still blurring)

I thought I wrong heard what he said to me or he wrong said 2 Ringgit become 1 Ringgit. Then it's okay... But I suddenly reminded my coursemate told me that price of fuel has already dropped to RM2.35 per litre, I now believe why he said that. It sounds kinda weird, I only heard of bus fare hiking, but not bus fare dropping. Sounds interesting and funny, too. Anyway, it's a good sign, hope price of everything's gonna drop and pay of salary is up.

Final day on fast.

Hooray..It's 11:50pm now, I'm kinda excited, 'cause my 3-day apple fast is gonna be over tomorrow. I'll start my breakfast with some crackers, not too heavy. I was like a dead body walking on street this morning, I wondered how could I still have energy to use up.

Very funny, perhaps it's because of starving for days, I thought of Indian Murukku just now. Uhm..Yummy..

Another excitement is actually I just renewed my Kaspersky Anti-Virus 2009 with an activation key until March 2010. Wow, it surprised me and this really eases my work, no more tiring to look for the activation keys for the next 2 years, temporarily ends my effort.

I gotta be putting more efforts to watch over the food I eat after today, less sugar, less oil, less processed food, more veges, more fruits, more water. I wonder if I could be a vegetarian. Haha, quite impossible, I still love KFC and McDonald's, but I don't mind to be a vegan for a few days or occasionally.

Erm..I suddenly remind a song by Carrie Underwood entitled "Don't Forget To Remember Me", says that, no matter how things turn out to be, I'm still the one who's never gonna change. Yup, I'm still holding my faith no matter what's gonna happen.


xoxo.

Day 2 on fast.

They are right, I'm now getting way more difficult to resist food. I can't even sit still besides crackers. I started off thinking of McDonald's fries, Secret Recipe's blueberry cheese cake, Domino's Pepperoni Pizza and much more. Whatever edible seems driving me crazy, my mind keeps appearing those food today.

But hang on, "I'm gonna be real healthy after the fast, toxin will get out from my body."

I started to hate apple, "apphobia" now. A new word from me, defines as a symptom of scared of apple. I ate 19 apples on last 2 days, 10 or more apples to go tomorrow.

Tomorrow is a new day for my short semester. I think I'll be having a short but blissful upcoming 7-week period. But I feel unhappy with the stupid schedule. I'm sure somebody's going to complain about this to the stupid officer and I hope the schedule will have some changes. Oh ya, I'll take Public Speaking on this semester, I'm damn happy to actually get a chance to speak up again, as I used to take same subject while I'm in foundation, can talk about my fave music, hopefully.

I'm sure I'll get myself a lovely smile tomorrow with my music, anyhow.


xoxo.

Day 1 on fast.

Oh..yeah..this is my first day of apple fasting. No cheating.

I went to Old Town Cafe to have a meeting this morning, I was like, "Damn! What should I order later?" I ended up the meeting with a glass of plain water. Good, what a great start by not having a cup of coffee or tea at coffee shop, which was insane. I don't know how other people might think about this, but for me, ordering plain water at coffee shop is crazy. Tasteless yet expensive. C'mon, 50 cents just for a glass of "sky juice". Plus, I knew somebody's going to treat me all. Haiz..Just forget it.

I was about to spend my whole day to draft out an outline for the coming Music Club vocal lessons with YaFu. Sounded great to work them out, I just can't wait.

9 apples, and plenty of water for today. That's what I take. I'll be doing the same thing for the next 2 days. Hope everything turns out to be fine.


xoxo.

A 3-day fast for myself

I'll be living without food but apple for this coming 3 days -- apple fasting. For my body's sake, I just knew that apple can help in detoxification. I don't know how much toxin I've been consumed these years as I'm always unavoidably, uncontrollably eating outside. Less sugar, less oil, less junk food as it's possible from now on. I know it's quite hard for me to do so, I'll try though, slowly.

The most excited thing is, I get managed to share this with my lovely mom, my mom's totally agree yet supporting me to have a 3-day apple fast, she wants to do the same, too. But too bad, she needs to cook for my family everyday, it's no way for my mom not to eat but just cook, every single food is gonna be kinda tempting when someone's fasting. Haha.. But I do hope my family can do this, it's very effective to eliminate toxin in body.


xoxo.

YouTube sharing 1

I know the feelings singing on the stage well, very emotional. 5 minutes to earn the applause, but how much have you spent behind the stage? Honestly, it's very very emotional, especially the mindset of impossibility of "finally dream comes true" has proved "it's possible".

Watch this, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEjVKa2GLaE by Queen Emily. I cried non-stop for this, but I clearly know the reason. I'm pretty sure every stage-person knows why.

闷，这一堂

闷呆了！特别觉得这一次的假期毫无意义。
无聊+无奈=现在的我。
庆幸是短短的3星期，要不然我可能会患忧郁症，而且是带有丧尸活动那一种。
人就是如此，总爱身在灰色地带，不要太极端，也不能太恶劣。

打个比喻，
感觉热的时候，就很想吹吹冷气；感觉冷了，倒想出外取取暖。
上课的时候爱假期；假期的时候爱上课。
现成的或是自动送上门的不要；自寻的，即使再难也要追求。
成天外出，家人说你不顾家；成天在家，家人说你闷。
... ...

有太多太多的对比了！
说得刺耳些，人就是犯贱。

谁不向往永远身在灰色地带？不过因周遭影响，压力的循环，灰色似乎是个遥无可及的颜色，对于平平无奇的人，有人说是安分，也有人说是所谓“暗淡无光”的范例。总比黑色地带恶劣的好，不过再想深一层，永远戚戚无名的当小卒，谁甘心？无形的压力就此来了。

哈！想远了。明明就出自于简单的单字--“显”。不过闷归闷，灰色还是我较向往的颜色，按部就班。我想是过于安分，不然现在也不会喊闷。

看看闷字怎么写就知道，把心锁在门下。所谓的“心房”，哈哈！

“Better in time”里的歌词说得正合我意，"It'll all get better in time..." 会随着时间的流逝而变得更好。正比喻着我漫长的假期。

大家加油打击郁闷这病魔！

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Like Celcom said:"The power is in your hands."
像天地通说：“一切掌握在你手中。”

Thank you.
谢谢。

Love really matters when thing's getting bigger

I truly believe everything that we think is now the biggest matter in your life will be seemed small after all. I know surrounding things have blinded us to see all the good, always highlight the bad things within, that's when the bad swallows your vision held in your mind. Like every time I feel so shame of doing something, or too coward to get myself better at that time, now I think it twice. What's really a big deal after all?

The time I struggled for assignments?
Bad relationships with my brother?
Quarreling like never before with best friend last year?
Joining a sensational feel-good event last semester?
or even my biggest shame on things I really matter,
Singing crack on last new year in my dad's house?

How would it be if I did these all without running out of my faith? It's not really a matter for me as time goes by, as long as I'm still holding my faith.

I know it's hard to keep going on a rainy day, sounds wrong to feel nothing after losing beloved ones, quite crazy not to cry after a breaking up. I know everything huge or insane in life needs a world of shutting out and just be left alone.

Think! Think twice or even thrice! What's really matter in your life after all? Where are the people loving you?

"When you figure out love is all that matters after all, it sure makes everything else seem so small."

That's why I keep reminding my family and friends that I love them.


*Inspired by song "So Small" by Carrie Underwood.
xoxo

云顶旅程慢慢细数

千呼万唤的云顶旅程终于在昨天圆满结束了。虽然是一身疲惫，不过却换来了很多美好的回忆，跟朋友玩就是不一样，开心多了。

接下来，我就把这一次云顶所发生的事件一一告诉大家。

事件一，
Small cloud with vegetable in front(SCWVIF) 迟到
*为了等SCWVIF，我和他就被逼要等下一趟班车上云顶了，结果他上了去后被我们这一群人“酸”。很可笑！

事件二，
我晕了
*都是雅福的错，玩转杯子的时候转得太快，害我连看4D Motion的时候都想吐了，还好吃了午餐后就有好转了。

事件三，
SCWVIF哭了（哇哈哈！）
*原因：玩space shot(跳楼机）。自称自己不容易哭的人哭了，哈哈！

事件四，
Wei Yen喜事
*托碰碰车(Bumper Car)的福，Wei Yen找到了好归宿（年纪小小，不过蛮帅的），虽然小Wei Yen 6岁，不过年龄绝对不是问题。真的很配，我有相为证。祝你们幸福安康。哇哈哈！

配对成功！

事件五，
Orange被奸
*男人被奸。不是可悲，而是可笑。

事件六，
寻宝
*蛮好玩的，不过很用神。最好笑是MatKool，还到雪糕摊去找。

事件七，
大派礼物
*哇哈哈，大部分都是赠品，我抽到O' Cha（绿茶口味的避孕套），什么奖品啊？！我在此要爆料，Yoke Fong抽到的香水也是赠品，是我们这几个上次在Fireman吃晚餐的时候以宣传之名送的，据说值RM150，价格不凡。大家似乎都上当了，还以为有什么超级大奖？哇哈哈！

事件八，
Guan Han倒了
*在他还没上云顶之前就已经到邦格岛去了，直上云顶，想不倒也难。祝你早日康复。


能够和自己疯得来的朋友一起玩真的很开心，虽然大家都像行尸走肉般的累，不过看得出大家都有点不太舍得。两天一夜虽然真的很少，不过短暂得来却富有意义；时间太长的话，大家反而不太会珍惜。就让这两天一夜的旅程成为我们未来想念彼此的回忆。慢慢细嚼，然后回味。

祝大家假期快乐，不假期也一样快乐。I love ya'll.


xoxo

Busy-bodied

This was the interesting scene on my MSN during exam week. Look at our "business" (busy+ness).

Look, "busy's" in a column.

Look closer.

Everyone seemed busy. My status was set as "busy", too.

Wish everyone is going to get yourself a status of "online"(free) sooner.

xoxo.

A Jooalicious Spirit

There were some time I was pushing myself quite hard to hit whistle notes (a.k.a super high notes or well-known as super high pitch, i.e. any notes higher than E6, 2 octaves higher from the middle E.) Unfortunately, I ain't born to hit that big notes, I did try. I can only hit sometimes when my vocal cord really had a good rest, but not always. So it doesn't count in my bound of vocal range. What really counts in vocal range is you can do them all every time you wanna do, full score in every single note without "cheating".

But then I figured out that whistle note is just like a bonus in vocal acrobatics. What I prefer my voice to be is actually more powerful in upper range of my chest voice, 'cause sometimes when I come to sing a couple high notes, it sounds like a bit struggling and consuming. After all, wide vocal range is nothing if you don't have a great chest register or good controlling.

For god's sake, after taking rest for some time, my voice quality is now much better than few weeks before, but still easily get vocal fatigue sometimes after extensively used. After taking some rest while preparing for final test, I'm so happy that I can sing my little runs again, and so interested to develop my runs skills. I'm gonna give it a try after my test.

The song I'm gonna work on this coming school break is "And I'm telling you I'm not going" covered by Jennifer Holiday. This is a spectacular song, extraordinarily soulful, but also extraordinarily tough to sing well, too. The big notes, emotions, and skills of this song are all crazy. I'll be glad if I can perform this piece for upcoming singing performance, it'll be a "wow" if I sing it nicely, hopefully. I wish I'm able to get my 3-week school break to have some vocal trainings at home, too. Working on runs, powerful chest register, and try out something else instead of pop, like hip hop and R&B, I began to love hip hop music recently. It's kinda like doing lips and jaw exercises, my mouth has to move fast to catch every word, very funny.

Everyone needs a boost of life. For me, I'm always finding my best voice for the song which suits me best and trying hard to impress people, revealing and proving to the people who used to bring me down, I like the feeling when they start to change their mind after I got myself some changes, got to prove myself, it's the best feeling I ever had so far. Muahaha...

A kinda Jooalicious spirit, keeps getting better and better...

xoxo

一切顺利

明天是我大二的第一个考试，有点慌~~


祝一切顺利。


xoxo

Imperfection is good

最近天气开始转凉了，很舒服。于是找来了很多借口窝在家里不去上课，因为家里太舒服了，很有安全感。如果说女人在男人的呵护下会有安全感，那男人在家里的被窝里是最有安全感的了。这几天窝在家里也不是因为真的要偷闲，除了在外头吃之外，我在家窝了整整4天都在赶功课，赶网页的东西，的确页页皆辛苦，也不知自己哪找来那么多的精神和毅力一个人干完也没有半点怨言，可能是因为自己觉得还蛮有成就感而忘了该生气了。不过其实我也不怎么样啦，自己一手一脚做的确学了很多，现在大功告成了真的很高兴。

不过现在唯一担心的是未来两星期的终考，到目前为止都还没来得及动那封尘已久的书，开始有点担心，不像上个学期，第13周就开始整理作业了。这个学期作业的截止期都几乎在期末，搞得我们在第14周也就是最后一周都还得赶作业，安排得真的太笨了！不过这次终考的时间表总算没有令我失望，利落得1星期半就考完了，甭拖太久，很好。

对了，今天我们的Alex哥终于在千呼万唤之下买了他的BMX自行车，从今以后不必再听他烦说要买自行车了，不过现在他似乎又有另一种懊恼，就是钱。天啊！他什么时候才学会停止唠叨？

刚下载了Natasha Bedingfield从第一张到最近的专辑的很多首歌，发现他也是一位很杰出的歌手，像 Carrie Underwood 和 Leona Lewis 一样，唱现场超棒！拍烂手掌... 他其中一首歌我特别钟爱，"Freckles",无论是歌词或旋律我都特别喜欢。其中有一句是这样的"Because a face without freckles is like a sky without the stars...those little imperfections make you beautiful, lovable, valuable, they show your personality inside your heart, reflecting who you are..."写得真的太好了，人总需要有些缺陷，少了它们就会变得很不真实，那一些小小的缺陷正是令你活得更漂亮，更讨喜，更有价值。它们更会凸现你的个性，反映真实的你。无话可说，写得太对了。

What a great night in Famine 30

Today was quite fun for me, could spend my night in Famine 30 performing. Guys there were just nice, clapping all the way though they had starved for 10 hours, thanks for everything. Honestly, singing "Bleeding Love" for me is quite a crazy pick, but I guess I've sung that nicely, wish I didn't put Leona Lewis to shame, muahaha!! I was just enjoyed the high notes and little runs thing in the end, they're just nice. And of course the down-to-earth guitarist, Hui Hsing, I couldn't make that without your help, your skills of guitar is just wonderful, thanks for making my dream comes true that I could sing "Anyway" by Martina McBride unplugged, I have dreamt to sing that song for so long. This song really meant a lot to me.

Not to forget our very talented talent night members were also done a good job. One and a half hours performing by 9 persons was completely a mad mission, but we really did manage the time well. Instead of talking all those craps by Guan Han, I thought everyone was really really good. The dance were great, the singing part were bravo, and the "xiang sheng" was terrific. It's a great night for me, I hope the audience's did, too.

After a great night, I have to carry on with my assignments again, it's tiring, but I know I can make it through the odds. Lim Kok Joo can!!

xoxo.

懊恼但明确

现在的我很累，很想睡了，肚子也饿得要命，但就是还得赶功课，很无奈。多两个星期就要终考了，这一次来得比上一次害怕多了，因为正当稍微可以从功课解脱之后，又马上要忙温书了。虽然忙，不过我还是乐在其中的，因为可以很充实的过着，不用想太多无畏的，没有时间处理那些芝麻小事，也懒得去管。现在我可以很诚实的告诉你，我很忙，不过我很快乐。

忙归忙，这个学期就快末了，还真的留下蛮多回忆的。至少还有时间做自己喜欢做的事情，至少不会迷惘的走着，有很明确的路指引我走着。

好了，真的累了，我看还是先睡个觉明天再拼吧！Haiz..突然间很想念那位炸家乡鸡的老公公，希望待会儿他会在梦境里带我到他的餐厅里去坐坐，嘻嘻！

Loving you

Today is Kah How's birthday. Oops! Now is 2am, should be yesterday, arh,whatever.. That was counted in my birthday celebration, too. I saw a lot of new faces in the orphanage house this time, and I don't know whether it is a good sign or bad, I just know they're all happy, just happy at the moment, I wish they really do. The moment that I will never forget today is when Kah How was advising me not to take any cold drinks, stick to the warm water instead when he knows I'm having throat sick. He's only 14, if I'm not wrong, but the way he speaks or acts is just like an adult, he knows how to take care of people around him, he stops the bullyboy, he knows how to love people around him. That was so warm to me.

Kah How and me celebrating birthday @ orphanage house. It meant a lot.

And tell you what, I don't mean to be showing off or telling for some reasons, I just wanna share my happiness here, my housemates got me a 7th birthday celebration last night. Gosh..I never expect I could have 7 times of birthday celebration in a year, this was too big for me, I mean my birthday is too long-lasting, sounds a little funny huh?! But I really really really do appreciate, you won't know how much I love you guys, but I do, and always do.

Celebrating my 7th birthday celebration with my housemates.

Though today is 12 August 2008, 4 days after my 20th birthday, I wanna be a little bit greedy. I'd love to request one more wish, the biggest wish in my entire life, I wish everyone around me is gonna be okay from the bad 'cause I'm always there loving you.

xoxo.

Rice Basket rocks

Yesterday was a good day for me, had fun at UTAR Sg Long campus. I was really mad with the beats and my lovely group, Rice Basket a.k.a K-Tank, they rocked the night, just love 'em so much. I've never been that crazy cheerful person before the night, honestly. I'm having throat sick, and I think I'm getting serious then, 'cause I did yell, feel sorry to my throat.

They said they'll have another training for next dance battle so soon, and I guess I'd wanna join them as I wanna be another multi-talented creature instead of just singing. Haha~ That'll be bloody fun, I guess.

xoxo.

Thanks for everything

It'll be very cliche to thank everyone who has celebrated my birthday and wished me, but I totally have no idea what to say instead of keep saying thanks. You guys meant a lot to me, a small but sincere wish really meant a lot to me, indeed.

I love ya'll. I wish everything's gonna be fine to you.

xoxo.

I wanna thank..

I know there are lots of moments too odd for me, my life's a little bit challenging. Negativity or criticism is everywhere to hit on me, like everytime I tried to be what they wanted from me, it never came naturally, that's why I always ended up in misery, wasn't able to see all the good around me, now I know they've actually wasted so much energy on what they thought on me.

And now, I've made the decision, never to give up till the day I die, never wanna dwell my pain again, 'cause there's no use in relieving how I hurt back then or remembering all the hell I felt when I was running out of my faith. That's why I woke up this morning with a smile on my face, and nobody's gonna bring me down today. I'm gonna say goodbye to all the tears I've cried, for everytime somebody hurts my pride, feeling like they won't let me live life and take the time to look what is mine. I wanna thank you for what I had above, too long struggling so that I couldn't go on, but now, I've found I'm feeling strong to move on, 'cause I believe they can take anything from me, they can definitely say anything they wanna say about me but they can't succeed in taking my inner peace, I'm gonna carry on and keep on doing my things.

For the people who has given me so much negativity and ever tried to bring me down, I wanna thank you. You've given me a lesson, you've made me stronger and I'm gonna keep on doing my things no matter what, throw all the fears I've held too long inside.

I'm gonna keep on doing my things, anyway.

休克

困扰了近4个月的喉咙不适，昨天终于在爸妈驯服下回家看了喉咙专科医生，说我发声带肿了，发炎。要我给嗓子休息两个月尽量不要说话，更不用说是唱歌。给了 我服4个月的药。要我做两个月蒸汽护理，说能够消炎消肿。这次可真的严重了，明天还得上台比赛，怕表现会害了作曲人的创作。还瞒着家人说要听话，真的对自 己的家人和声音感到内疚。

我答应自己在明天过后就要乖乖收声，我承认自己在过去半年过于用坏自己的声带，说话都用喊的，还频频上KTV。这一次真的要好好照顾自己的声音了，像医生说的必要时才说话，唱歌。

现在声带状态正处于休息当中，明天又必须开启，随明天后的未来2个月我将会是一个少话的自闭小孩。哇哈哈！谢绝找我唱KTV，也千万别引诱我，不然我会给你好看！

属于我的月份

踏入8月份了，代表着我自己的月份。很高兴，不过却没有历年来得期待了。今年的8月份即将会有很多节目充当，其中自己最期待的是我哥的毕业典礼，我们家在千呼万唤下终于出了个大学生了，大家都很替哥开心。这次哥的毕业典礼正巧碰到我的生日，所以我生日当天需要回家拍摄影照，真的很期待。除此之外，我生日那天也是难得4年一度的奥运会首天，感觉大家都在为我的生日倒数一样，很兴奋（狗屁+“有什么好兴奋？”）哈~

哎，虽然说8月份是我大学的期末，难免会有一箩的功课向我招手，不过我还是可以很高兴而且期待的迎接这一个充满意义的月份。

8月动向

8月6日-歌曲创作比赛 （演唱）
8月8日-我的生日 （庆祝）
-奥运开幕 （电视现场观看）
-哥的毕业典礼 （庆祝）
8月9日-新加坡国庆（关我屁事！）
-Streetbeatz Dance Competition （支持）
8月31日-我国国庆


祝一切都好。

终于...累了

我们之间存在着太多的差别。
你太好了，
你的成就令我很自卑。
于是我试着赶上，
我试着去追求你所追求的一切。
当然我也希望借着这一点可以对自己严谨一些，
你开始成为了原动力，
我一直的追，
开始发现自己有了盲性的追求。

我刷牙要像你；
读书的方式要像你；
说话的语气要像你；
喜欢颜色的品味要像你；
听音乐的习惯要像你；
甚至是你对这世界一切的观点也要像你。

不对劲了，
我开始会想念你的一切，
我开始发现这不是普通的追求，
我开始发现自己...

不过我知道，
我再怎么追也只能追。
终有一天追累了，
伤痕累累，
驿站坐着，
就会发现在这喧嚣的城市里终究是充满着许多的不可能。

不过现在还是盲目的赶上着，
虽然是等着受伤，
不过却很期待。
很傻~
等着这一天追累了就会回望嘲笑自己多么的愚蠢无知。
等着终于的终于...

我很好

这个学期开始，我特别喜欢步行去上课，因为可以真的看到许多的人生。有的推着车子上菜市，有的准备晨跑，有的拉着犬儿散步，也有的跟我一样步行往学校去。从我家到学校大概需要走个半小时，一个人走的话,MP3就是我的好朋友了。那种感觉很奇妙，好像在看MTV的感觉，身边的一切不断的移动着，耳机里的歌不断的播放着。我就是喜欢这样真实的MTV，没有NG的人生虽然听起来很可怕，不过事实就是永远那么的真实。没有重新来过的事实，只有重新起跑的人生。


前天我看见一只小狗一直跟着主人自行车的尾儿。更凸现了早晨“重新起跑”的气息。

我从来都不奢求什么，只希望自己现在和未来走的路会是当初自己所坚持的。恳求10年后，20年后或更久的将来都是那一位永远不会变质和忘本的自己。

不过我还是会向往有回报的一切。比方说，人与人之间的关系如果可以像塑胶弹球一样那该多好，用多少的力气把弹球往地上打，就有多少的力气回弹。


这样的人生最安全的了。

A very musical intro of me

Profile
Name: Lim Kok Joo a.k.a KJ a.k.a Tiff
Age: 19 turning to 20 very soon
Likes: Music, Vocal Playing
Hates: Pretenders

Genre music that I prefer: Vocal, Pop, R&B, Country, Soft Rock, A capella, Gospel, Classics

Genre music that I hate: Heavy rock, Disco/Techno

Fave vocalists: (C) Rene Liu Ruo Ying (E) Christina Aguilera, Leona Lewis, Delta Goodrem,
Carrie Underwood, Katharine McPhee, David Cook etc.

My greatest moment: Having performance in front of 2000++ audiences

My ultimate dream: Write my own song, People can get connected from my singing, ignore every single negativity and keep on singing my song.

My all-time-favorite single: "The Voice Within" by Christina Aguilera, "Beautiful" by Christina Aguilera, "Innocent Eyes" by Delta Goodrem, "幸福的路" by Rene Liu, "So Small" by Carrie Underwood, "Home" by Katharine McPhee, "Anyway" by Martina McBride.

Songs that I currently listen to: Leona Lewis's "Whatever it takes", "The Best You Never Had", "Better In Time", "Misses Glass"; Alicia Keys's "Fallin'"; Mariah Carey's "Bye Bye" and Tori Amos's "Silent All These Years".

Songs that odd me all time: "A Moment Like This" by Kelly Clarkson; "Hurt" by Christina Aguilera; "So Small" by Carrie Underwood; "Homeless" by Leona Lewis; "I Will Always Love You" by Whitney Houston

Personal Vocal Range: 3 and a half octaves; F2-C6; Chest Register: F2-B4; Head Register: C5-C6

狗狗与我

今天在吃晚饭的途中看见一对狗鸳鸯在路边做爱做的东西。这肯定不会是我第一次看，因为我们家以前也有养一对狗狗的，简直是司空见惯，不过这一次的很劲爆！我还是第一次看狗狗原来也会口交耶，我看了简直是喊了出来，接着就是笑声，哈~

我以前的狗狗一只叫石头，另一只叫牙齿，哈哈！开玩笑啦，一只叫Rocky,而另一只叫Gigi。Rocky养了10年，1997年12月29日带来我们家的，2007年中就老死。Gigi大概是养了4年，2006年就失踪了，这只笨狗是不会认路回家的，我是罪魁祸首，是我把它弄丢的。现在想起真的很心酸，换是我被丢失了，我一定会很伤心，会自问是不是主人不要我了？

突然间很想念它们，不知它们现在在天国过得好吗？

.....

Footprints in the sand

Currently I'm really crazy with Leona Lewis's "Footprints in the sand". That's such a meaningful song to everybody. The song is tribute to the helpless childs who have lost somebody. It gives me goosebumps and really wanna cry every time watching its MV, it's so sad.

I'd wanna promise the childs that I'm always be there for them whenever needed that reminds me last visit at orphanage house last week. It's painful deep into my heart by looking at those helpless childs. They're so innocent, they shouldn't have this kinda physical pain as they deserved to live better and happily. Stays strong, babes! Everything will be alright.

Here are the music video footages.

You guys should have listen to this song. This song meant a lot to me, and this is somehow the music should sound. You'll love it, too.

Third day and last day

Day 3

Our third stop of MV shooting is in the chapel and the 4-million show house in Subang Jaya. The chapel actually looks like a church for wedding. We got to the chapel around 11:05am and the sky was still raining, what a good weather for sleeping! Graphic design students were also followed with us for photo shooting. Everything was going really well until the lighting burned the tissue papers. We were completely blank for at least 3 seconds at the time we looked at the flame, we ran to it after we really feel conscious, that's really funny when I think this back.

After wedding shooting, we went to Sunway Pyramid to buy some equipments and of course to eat lunch.

After this, the time we had waited for so long was finally come, we got to the show house by 4:30pm, what our mouth really spoke was just kept saying "wah!" and "wah!". But what really impressed me were actually the lift and the garage, that's damn unbelieveable! I never imagine a house can have a lift, that's too... Haizz, just forget it.

8:30pm is the time I got home. Felt fantastic for everything.

Welcome to Sarah & Kenny's Wedding.

A 4-million house in Subang Jaya.

I never thought of a house could have a lift.

Out-view of the balcony. Damn nice!

Day 4 (Last day of MV shooting)

Before our last stop in Jaya One, we got to Orphanage House again to shoot a missed-out shot, we met the orphans and the disabled childs again, I did cry today as I looked at the helpless syndrome down kids lying on the floor, struggling like he wants to go with me. I held his hand tightly, I can feel he's really getting sufferred. It really hurts, I mean my heart. I feel I'm the greatest and happiest human in the world, afterall.

Last stop for our MV shooting was in Palm Square, Jaya One. We shoot in front of the Overseas Restaurant and the fountains, just felt great. All the extras (K-leh-feh) were amazing, shout a zillion thanks for their coming. You guys meant a lot to the MV.

KFC besides MC was where we go for dinner by around 10pm.

I got home by 11:00pm.

Behind the scene.

Informing the extras what to do.

xoxo.

17 July.

Second day

After a day of getting familiar with the DV, we became really great in managing and handling the situation. Everything went really fun and great in the second stop, orphanage house in Taman Megah. I love the children, they're innocent, they're happy all the time even they're being abandoned or suffering from syndrome down. This makes me feel really wrong and sorry when there's something not really going smooth in my life, our troubles seem nothing if compared to what they've really faced. We as normal human beings really have to feel contented for what we have and what we see every second in our lives, be easily contented, be a happy-body, always.

Many thanks to Ng Kah How, his mom, Mei Mei and for our very responsible security, "Henry". We wouldn't be so well without you guys.

I'm gonna miss those children, too. Love 'em so much! You've made me understand what's really count in my life.

"Bye-Bye" by Mariah Carey is the right song for them and me. Leave all our sadness behind, welcome home, happiness!


Setting up all the equipments in the orphanage & disabled chilldren house.


One of our characters in the MV, his name is Ng Kah How.


Me and the children in the orphanage house.


xoxo.

15 July.

First day

It's a good day for me today, a good beginning for our MV shooting assignment, everything went well this afternoon, feel touching, feel grateful for everything. Our very first stop was Lovely Old Folks Home in PJ SS3, our talent was such a nice old lady, she's the one my group leader, Cerenna and I felt she's the lady that is the most appropriate selection out of the rest in the old folks home, 'cause we have impressed by her glorious smile at first sight, feel very warmed. I still remember she had turned us down for sitting on the wheel chair at first visit, but she has let this go this afternoon, that was quite surprising me. Her name is Aunty Alice, I'm gonna miss her for sure.

Here, "Through The Rain" by Mariah Carey is the song I'd love to dedicate to the old folks. Be every human that can make it through the rain, be strong enough to mend whenever falling, hold tighter to your own faith whenever you feel afraid. Love ya'll.

Going to the first stop from PG block.

Checking and setting up all the equipments.

It's time to say "bye bye". Thanks, Aunty Alice.

xoxo.

14 July.

一个人？

我做任何事情都喜欢一个人，
一个人逛商场，
一个人在家，
一个人唱KTV，
甚至是一个人说话...
或许更贴切的说法应该是自己习惯成性了。
习惯了一个人的生活，
习惯了一个人走着自己的路。

喜欢不时就哼起歌来，
喜欢突然很起劲的唱起歌来，
喜欢瞬间就可以跳起舞来。
即使唱得多烂，
或唱得多感伤，
跳得多难看，
或跳得似模似样，
都不会有人批评自己，
也不会有人赞叹自己。
这样的生活有多好，
以平常心去面对一切，
少了傲慢，
少了哀伤。

我特别喜欢一个人在家，
没有约束，
没有形象可言，
没有话语保留，
可以很自在的伸个大懒腰，
带着老旧的眼镜，
随着凌乱的头发，
在家中裹住。
好自在，
好真实。

我特别喜欢一个人逛商场，
没有矛盾，
没有犹豫，
更不会有争吵。
可以随性的走进自己喜欢的地方，
买自己喜欢的而不需要多于解释的小东西。
即使只呆个半小时也不会有人抗议。
在商场中尽情的奔驰，
好自在，
好真实。

我特别喜欢一个人上KTV，
没有压力，
没有批评，
也不会有掌声。
可以任意的唱着自己之前不敢唱的歌，
可以点别人不晓得唱的歌，
可以给嗓子歇息尽情的唱走板。
即使含泪唱着，
也不会有人笑我懦弱，
不会有人给予慰问。
好自在，
好真实。

我唯一不喜欢一个人的时候，
就是当自己有成就，
憧憬无限的时候。
因为心里面想不出任何一个名字来...
可以分享喜悦的名字。


好可悲，
却真实...

嗓子，歇下吧！

这几个月发声带都出现问题，怀疑自己在上几个月过度使用自己的嗓子，加上声带没有好好真正的休息过，所以造成喉肌衰竭。没唱两首歌就觉得很累，还有类似肿瘤的东西在发声带之间，已经有好几个月了，都还没空上诊所查诊。声音在这几个星期有撕裂的感觉，开始有一点担心，怕会造成永久性损坏。

下个月会有一场创作比赛，需要演唱。所以趁现在距离还有一个月的时间，我看是时候要实践嗓子冬眠治疗了（Voice Sleep Therapy)。避免高分贝交谈和尽量少交谈，谢绝唱歌，更不用说上KTV，封嗓为期一个月。

记得我最后一次封嗓是2002年的事了，当时是因为到新加坡旅行两星期，完全没有唱歌的机会。那时两星期后再唱回歌是完全控制不了自己的声音，频频走板，那时我真的是完全接受不了，后来再多唱两天，发现原来喉肌跟我们身体其他部位的肌肉一样，经过休息后的喉肌会松懈下来，需要被“开启”。一旦被“开启”后就可以得心应手。我封嗓两星期后的音质变得更“干净”，也更响亮，因为有了充分的歇息。

其实早在一年前就有想过要放自己的声音一个长假，不过不论是表演、比赛、唱KTV或是在浴室尽情地唱着，都无法脱离声音的引用，而且要我三天不唱歌已经会是很难的事了，更甭说是一个月。所以希望自己在这未来的一个月会真的有毅力封嗓。因为这一切都是为了自己的嗓子的将来着想。

明天又有期中会考，希望一切加油！

10:33pm; 08 July 2008

Today's my mom's 48th and youngest brother's 16th birthday.

I'm here wishing them have a Happy Birthday, love both of them so much! Muacks...

考疯了

哈哈~ 应该不止两下，那我哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈~

今天我真的快疯了！竟然会“善用”这个学期所学的Photoshop来恶整别人的照片，上Friendster抓朋友的照片来“胡搞”，真的太有趣了！一阵滑鼠的“咔嚓”声随后就是一阵狂笑声。连我自己都不敢相信这是我的所作所为。很好，又是一个发泄的好方法。像Communication Theory 所谓的Catharsis Theory，利用媒体来当作发泄的作用。啊哈~ 我想考试可以用这一个当例子，感同身受嘛！甭背得半条人命。

快考试了嘛！你也来找个方法发泄发泄吧！一来就是会疯掉，要不然玩了更疯。哈~

Singing sharing:The way I like music

Everybody around me knows I love music, that is why I love singing. For me, I truly believe music and singing are arts, 'cause there are no particular ways for 'em, we can make music and enjoy anyway we'd love to, sing our own style and play with our own skills. I hate rules, that's the reason I love music and singing a lot.

I don't mean to be cocky here, but I must admit that I know a lot about singing, I love to listen to people singing, I could only stick to one song for a whole day, play it over and over again just to listen to the skills that the singer has used in the song, and then its lyrics and emotions. Tell you what, I'm kinda dumb in the sense of music, I bought a music album, I might not kinda in love with a song at first heard, but I might tell you recently I love an old song after 2 years that's actually one of the collection in the CD. It's worthy for me buying a music album as I can stick to it for up to 2 years. Like Rene Liu's 2004 album "听说"(over heard...), I'm still stick to some of the songs in it and never ever feel sick whenever listening to it for over 4 years. Time has paid everything I possess, I spend at least 5 hours a day for song listening.

Some singers, I mean those who sing, not supposedly a whole-packaged artist, spend their whole life to hit some big notes in order to impress listeners. I personally don't think this is a great thing to do in singing, singing is the way we enjoy and interpret ourselves. I love hitting those big notes is because the consideration of singing skills but not to only impressing someone. But very funny to say that high note is the factor excites me, always. What I think is we must first to catch your tune, soul and emotions(foundation of the art of singing) up before working on these high notes, c'mon, at least. That's an equation that I always keep in my mind:

Vocal(voice) + Techniques(skills) + Emotions(feelings) = A good singer/song.

I believe everyone's stepping forward to another perception level of music or singing. A good eureka really needs a lotta time. Let's improving together.

信心先生，请永远住在我心里。

今天心血来潮回看自己上载在Friendster的旧照片。看见自己的样子真的有在变化，可能是心境由里至外不断的蜕变导致的，我回想每一张“咔嚓”一声的回忆，那一刻的思绪，再拿现在来比较，发现自己真的学懂了很多。换句话，也对自己诚实了许多，比以前更坦然以对，更能面对自己。

或许是赋性对自己有惯性的自信心，也可能是自己属于狮子座的关系，我还蛮不能忍受那一些自暴自弃，甚至是自我颓废的人，还未尝试就先说放弃不行，说自己永远都没有能力像某某般成功，这些其实都在放屁！我不知道到底是他们谦虚还是虚伪，我本身就觉得一个人对自己没有信心就等于对自己下了慢性毒药，永远不会去尝试新的东西，就永远的自我颓废下去。像我啊，对自己真的有用不完的信心，我永远相信自己只要肯努力的话终有一天我一定比Bill Gates成功，歌唱得比Christina Aguilera好，舞跳得比Michael Jackson的赞。有句话我觉得很管用的“世事无绝对”，只要有基本的自信心+无极限的冲劲+努力，就会=漂亮的成就啦。

我一直相信...

我明白为什么自己不断地在变了，因为我比以前更自信了。有新的座右铭："I believe in the impossible, is possible to overcome, I believe in the miracles, born from love in everyone."

说起来今天还蛮怀旧的，听回刘若英刚出道的歌“为爱痴狂”，是他师傅陈昇的词曲，越来越喜欢这首歌了。

Lulu and Kat...

I finally recovered from the illness, my voice is now much better than last night. Taking rest is truly needed for all "sickers", believe me.

It's gotta be week 6 of this semester starting tomorrow, I never know time has passed so damn fast, mid-term tests are just around the corner, I have a little worry, but it's still okay, 'cause nothing's worse than sick, I can rush, and still.

I just figured out the song "Bleeding Love" by Leona Lewis is actually written by Jesse McCartney, he has done his rendition of this song, too. The arrangement is different, I personally love Leona's one, it's sensation in both the arrangement and voice. And guess what, Katharine McPhee's collaborate-with-David Foster new single, "All I need is you" was out as commercial song for Japan Airlines, I really glad to hear that Kat is gonna be back with her niche, ballad and jazzy music. According to the news, her coming album will be out on December 2008... Oh god, I can't wait!

Reasons why I love Xtina so much...

I personally love kinda inspiring song, it's not only give me strength to carry on, but also lead me to some new point of view. That's why I love Christina Aguilera so much.

You'll need to listen to "The Voice Within" whenever you have lost your faith to carry on what you have holding for so long.

"When there's no one else look inside yourself,
like your oldest friend just trust the voice within,
then you'll find the strength that will guide your way,
you'll learn to begin to trust the voice within..."
[The Voice Within, Christina Aguilera]

We should keep believing ourselves, insisting what we have believing for so long, never change, that's why I keep on singing, singing my song.

"I believe they can take anything from me,
but they can't succeed in taking my inner peace from me.
They can say all they wanna say about me,
but I'm gonna carry on, keep on singing my song..."
[Keep On Singing My Song, Christina Aguilera]

Although there's so much to choose, love is the key we always find to do, just dare to try, try your own way.

"Don't be scared to fly alone,
find a path that is your own.
Love will open every door, it's in your hands, the world is yours.
Don't hold back and always know all the answers will unfold.
What are you waiting for? Spread your wing and soar..."
[Soar, Christina Aguilera]

6月23日的日记

今天有两种很极端的心情。

快乐篇

终于买了台电脑，零件、屏幕、键盘、滑鼠统统都是分开买的，就连主要的“内脏”都是拼成的，一整套都是黑色，说起来还真的是巧合。由于明天早上没有课，所以今天在网上徘徊到深夜会是肯定的了，况且现在上网的速度又不赖。说实在的，拥有一台自己的私人电脑可是我当初的梦想，如今实现了，真的有"dream finally comes true"的感觉。可能我就是这样，一件小小的事情就可以开心个好久好久。就像上次可以认识一班对任何事情都很有热诚的Talent Night朋友，到现在我还是对他们说的每一句话、做的每一个举动念念不忘，总要回想个好多好多遍。可以认识到一班小自己几岁的朋友真的令我觉得自己年轻了不少咧，嘻嘻！（骗自己的！）总而言之呢，真的要很感谢我周遭发生的一切，所认识的人，在此说声一千一万个谢谢。

感叹篇

很简单，我实在太想念Talent Night的朋友们了。刚下载了training时跳舞的伴奏，东方神起的“气球”，闪过了很多当时的回忆，这证明了什么？证明了我们把这一届的Talent Night做活了，There are more than just an event...

A Brand-New Beginning

"A new beginning, a new chapter of my life..."

I turned to blogspot finally, feel like starting everything again, this is the feeling ever since I loved for so long, a new breath, a clear beginning with a hopeful heart.

I'll get myself a PC sooner, think I'll be writing something about myself and my music so often, 'cause I've always got a lot of thoughts to write on.

UTAR Talent Night was just completely over, feel a little upset 'cause thinking of I wouldn't have more time to spend together and hanging out with all the contestants again. Honestly, they are good to be loyal friends, their passion is uncountable, they've warmed my deepest heart. I feel grateful for everything that happened to me these few weeks, I really appreciate. And it's nice and great to hear that UTAR Idol will be coming so soon. Though I won't be one of the participants for sure, I just can't wait my juniors to win this over, they're so much talented than me. Anyway, my next things to do will always be my candles, light up my next path, very contented.

Recently, I fell in love with Syesha Mercado's "One Rock 'n' Roll Too Many", it's a very playful song, vocal sounds booming, and recent-hottie Leona Lewis's "Better In Time", her voice is such an art, perfectly, wisely, and stunningly sings every single note of song, very impressive. I wish you should give this two songs a try, it's good to listen.

Now, I'm on waiting mode, waiting for my new PC, waiting to keep all my joyness into it. I just can't wait...